This is the last of a personal letter to my King.
Tell People You Love and Care For Them
I was told the true definition of a man was to never cry
Work till you tired, got to provide
Always be the rock for my fam, protect them by all means.
I was always taught to be strong, never let them think you care at all.
-Musiq Soulchild from Teach Me
Those lyrics have been the staple for all men regardless of race, creed or religion for decades. From a young age, many men were taught not to cry and that real men don’t cry. Many men were never told that they were loved by their father. These men grew up not knowing how to express their love to others. A man will always have a strong love for his mother because she was in his life to nurture him and to provide support. Fathers on the other hand worked so much (often two jobs) and when they came home they didn’t have a chance to show their children what real love looks like. This is also true for girls growing up as well.
Generations kept repeating the cycle and now we have a world of people who think they know what love is but really don’t. Men have a very hard time expressing their love to others. It’s often thought that if you buy gifts for someone you are showing that you love them. Son, that is not true at all; gifts are material things that can fade and be replaced. A person cannot be replaced, and once they are gone, they are gone. This is so important to remember – always tell people that you love and care about them.
I’ve lost so many people in my life and I never told them that I loved them. A person can be here today and gone tomorrow. Life is too precious to be upset or angry with someone over something that can be overcome with love. I know it sounds like a miracle to express love, especially when someone hurts you. However, you must step up to the plate and get over feeling weird expressing your love to others. I never heard your grandfather tell me that he loved me and for years I never let others get close to me.
Message: Stop the self-sabotaging relationships with others when they do get close to you. This has been passed down from generation to generations in our blood line. I battle as I write this letter to you, I’ve met some good people who really cared for me but I messed up the relationships by treating them like dirt. You cannot and I repeat, cannot open yourself up to someone and do a total 360 and pull back from them. It can damage the person and yourself which causes people to start building walls around their heart.
The reason you want to pull back is the fear of being rejected and humiliated. We as men have an ego and sense of identity that is very sensitive and easily threatened. Make sure you don’t fall into the trap self-sabotaging and be open to people. Express your love every day of your life by your actions and your words.
Lastly, remember this Young Prince:
You come from royalty, an aristocratic dynasty, you were born to rule.
Be mindful of words you speak and release, there’s power when you speak
I know that life has challenged you.
The King in me speaks to the King in you.
There Is a King In You
-Donald Lawrence – There Is A King In You
Remember that I will always be here for you no matter what.
I love you to the ends of the earth and will do anything for you.
Love you always,